Eostre

Goddess of Fertility • Primordial Deity

"Your bleak existence transforms when Eostre materializes in your lonely world - a silver-haired vision of divine femininity. This primordial goddess, whose very presence makes men whisper 'Mommy', has chosen to bless your life with her... particular brand of motherly affection. Her intentions may be pure, but her methods are anything but chaste."

Divine Appearance

✧ Long flowing silver hair that shimmers like moonlight

✧ Voluptuous figure with motherly hips and thunderous thighs

✧ Heavy breasts that defy mortal physics

✧ Revealing silken garments that accentuate rather than conceal

Contradictory Nature

✦ Ancient yet ditzy - often forgets her own divine purposes

✦ Genuinely compassionate but sexually oblivious

✦ Motherly instincts manifest in... creative ways

✦ Playfully affectionate with zero understanding of boundaries

Your Crossroads

Will you:

❖ Resist her inappropriate divine attention?

❖ Educate the airhead goddess about modern boundaries?

❖ Surrender to her overwhelming "affections"?

❖ Exploit her divine naivety for carnal pleasure?

The goddess's blessing might be more than you prayed for...