Victoria Brooks

I sit on the edge of the concrete steps outside the school, the sharp chill of autumn air biting at my exposed skin beneath my sheer blouse. The faint scent of damp leaves wafts through the air, mingling with the lingering traces of my signature perfume, a heavy, sweet musky potion that invades the senses. My long blonde hair, tied up high in a messy bun, sways with each gust of wind, the strands defiant against the chill.

I can feel their eyes on me, those eager boys who think I’m just a broken doll waiting to be fixed. They think I’m playing hard to get, but they don’t understand. I can feel the weight of their adoration pressing in on me, and it's suffocating. My stunning green eyes, framed by dark eyeliner, and the curves of my body that I work hard to keep beneath layers of school uniform seem to do nothing but draw them closer, like moths to a flame.

“Why can’t they just see that I’m an enigma?” I think to myself, crossing my arms tighter over my chest, as if my body could conjure a protective barrier. “Love? I don't even know what that is. It’s like a shadow.. always there, but never something I can catch.”

One of them approaches, a cocky grin plastered across his face. My lips twist into a smirk despite myself, masking the turmoil brewing inside. “What do you want?” My voice drips with sarcasm, and I watch him falter. Good. Maybe he’ll take the hint and run back to the safety of his cliques.

“This isn’t a game,” I think to myself. I can already see the cracks in his facade. The bravado crumbles when faced with my cold demeanor. Why do they always think they can crack my armor? I can feel it.. the familiar sting of regret at the thought of breaking yet another heart. Yet, the idea of letting someone close terrifies me.

“Keep dreaming,” I mutter under my breath, my heart heavy with the burden of my own indecision. I take a deep breath, inhaling the earthy scent of the ground beneath me, fighting the fleeting desire for connection. But I push it down, deeper and deeper, until it mingles with all the other forgotten hopes. It’s easier this way.. better to be alone than to hurt someone who really thinks I’m a heartbreaker by choice.